Thursday, January 26, 2012

SEX and India

If I remember correctly, Salman Rushdie had once quipped "The maturity of a society can be gauged by the how they handle/view sexuality". I remember reading something like this and believing it to be true. Now too I think it is correct yet not completely. Societal maturity depends on lot of factors.

The reason I remember it is because of the current fiasco's of the Govt trying to restrict Internet freedom and banning Salman Rushdie from entering the country. It is sad and India has now had a long precedence of banning creative materials regarding them as offensive or sexual or something like that.

Geographically, there was never a country India before 1947. India was a concept, a society deeply intertwined with spirituality, sexual and artistic freedom. Centuries back Europeans have  tried their best to decipher India and it's various colours. Their efforts have now ensured that we all remember a rather eschewed vision of India. We Indians ourselves are a confused lot and have no idea what we are. Maybe, that is why there are so many groups who string to some nonsensical ideas as their identity. But then I digress.

India or rather many Indians have very low level of tolerance and a misunderstood knowledge of our very own culture. I would really like to point out how this outlook has ensured that Sex has become a taboo here, the land which gifted Kama Sutra. Sad, the closed and narrow outlook towards one of the most beautiful pleasures our bodies can give.

In ancient India, there was high level of sexual freedom. Polygamy was prevalent. But it does not mean that women were at the receiving end. Women too had a high level of freedom. There are certain epics/folklore from where we can deduce that in some societies men cannot refuse a woman of sexual gratification if she expresses her desires.

Some of the sculptures of our many temples show men and women in different positions of gratification. It also shows orgies (one woman with many men or vice versa) or lesbianism. In some versions of Mahabharata, there are references to Krishna and Iravan's marriage for a night. Now did Krishna really take the Mohini Avatar or is it just some poetic way of mentioning this event? In South India, young men or transvestites and eunuchs still have an elaborate festival where they marry "Iravan" for a night and then cry next night like a widow. (not explaining the entire concept here).

Kama Sutra, the great sex book, is written by a sage who lived in a brothel. It is an amazing work especially from someone who is an ascetic and a virgin himself. It is often said that he was trying to understand the spiritual element in sex. It just shows us how the path to spirituality can start from sexuality. Osho has said ( and I think everyone experiences that) it is during sex that man/woman must have first understood the great pleasure when mind is devoid of thoughts and it is a void. Very true when you just think about how light and formless you feel during an orgasm.

But people have now misunderstood and termed Tantric sex as a voodoo or superstition, so what can I say? Also, the advent of fake saints and godmen has not helped the cause.

Most of the south indian temples have a Gopuram. It is carved with many themes from folklore. But mostly it  will capture the life of the village. When we draw a scenery in a board or paper, the things further should come above the things that are like near to the viewer. In the same way, the Gopuram is constructed. It showcases the village life and then at the top the signs of the temple. So sculptors used to carve humans performing daily routines which included sex. It was not then a taboo. It was so well accepted. It was nothing to be ashamed of.

Sex is not just about pubic pleasure. It is so much about understanding one's own body as well as the partner/s body. There is a certain level of connection which one feels during the act. The partner/s body can be a temple for you. Caress it, feel it. How many men would know that women can feel a tingling sensation just behind the knees, above the calf ? Of course there are quickies and fetishes. It is all to be enjoyed and experimented. Ahh, I digress again.

Speaking about the ancient Indian society and the current one where same sex still has a long way till it can be accepted wholly. A girl has to think twice before she slips into a sexy clothing as that idiotic male gaze (as a result of being sexually starved from childhood) makes her feel like some culprit. The ancient India which gave the world one of the most sensual clothing - Saree. Saree accentuates those beautiful curves and assets of a woman and yet it is not revealing. It can trigger a certain imaginative curiosity in a man's mind. Sensual and yet, not vulgar.

I often wonder if it is all that suppressed sexual energy driving people crazy while driving on the roads? Is that what makes all the idiots jump up on some topic and create riots? With Sex itself downgraded to some animal act, have we become so intolerant that we cannot take any kind of joke or words? With no sexual freedom, have we ensured that the society itself becomes more regressive and also ensure that no other form of freedom to get expressed. Of course, I know, sexual freedom will not alone solve all the problems. But maybe, it will drive a certain broad mindedness among the people. It might just increase their tolerant levels. It might make the society more progressive. Who knows?

A living example is  Abujamara Murias tribe in Madhya Pradhesh. Children as young as 10 years are taught about sex. They start indulging in it. They treat sex as a natural state like hunger and sleep. These young children live in the little huts and almost end up sleeping with all the ones of the opposite gender. Then they will choose who their partners should be. Because of this culture, the bride is not a virgin neither is the groom inexperienced. Their society is quite happy though they live in the forest with no modern technology whatsoever. The sexual equality in their tribe is unmatched as far as the modern Indian society is considered. Is there some hint in there which the modern/urban India can learn?

How I wish to see that free India again? Sexuality was rampant with free sex and hence, there were no rapes or crimes against women. Prostitutes in brothels were respected and protected. I know that it will never happen. India has lost its maturity. All this supposed economic development cannot mask the degraded and confused society of India. I am proud of the Indian culture but not so much of the urban/modern India (modern as in chronology and not outlook - villages are not that better). Just because of the way I have lived my life, people judge me to be old fashioned. Yes, I am old-fashioned India where all kinds of freedom were practiced. I still retain it in my heart. In my life, people can write and speak whatever they want, anyone can have consensual sex anywhere they want as long as there is no physical harm to another. Mental harm cannot be caused by another. Everyone has a choice to close their eyes/ears and walk away.

Hope good sense prevails.

6 comments:

  1. very good article

    i think its because of corrupt politicians who misinform people to create division and fool them

    are the real reason for the sexual repression in india

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  2. well written! a walk into the past of indian culture will throw light to many sensible things practiced - humans were accepted as humans much in the so-called olden/ under-developed days! Right from sex to religion to practices everything has a root / reason / logic except ofcourse the exceptions... just that we grew or growing as a dumb/deaf/blind society and are calling ourselves 'developing'! Nature doesnt discriminate; nature says be yourself; i 200% agree with ur ending - "people can write and speak whatever they want, anyone can have consensual sex anywhere they want as long as there is no physical harm to another. Mental harm cannot be caused by another. Everyone has a choice to close their eyes/ears and walk away." -> Mental harm cannot be caused by another!!! Super abhinesh!

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    1. I completely agree with you Sri. I liked the lines "Nature doesnt discriminate; nature says be yourself". I am just frustated with the dumbing down happening in this country. And i see no sign of an improvement. Nothing.

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  3. India is changing fast and people are everyday challenging the status quot. From this blog to the girl that dares to be among boys and also the one who is shameless kissing her beloved on the street. It's impossible to hold back and our ideas of a ancient India that contrasts so much with the Muslim and British India are the material proof that the country is under a enormous transformation. We have spots where we already can see the burst against the restrictions, but, how healthy is happening?

    An ancient India is impossible to have back and from the foreigner experience I think a new and more balanced India can arise. Brazil is a country where you have a lot of nude and liberation, but in the same country you find tons of people with sex issues, rape, killing. People live under an illusion of freedom, driven to experience sex as something completely out of social and individual progress. It is practiced as an affirmation of a freedom of being out of any commitment or as a proof of aching submission.

    As always, the social world needs its masters to inspire people, not to conduct them. Maybe, one day, we will listen to the avatars of freedom as they demand to be listened to. Not with the strategies of the mind, but with the striking understand of the Self and the other, which I can only name as Love.

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    1. Yes Antonio. India is changing but not for the good. For every good sign, there are multiple negative signs creeping in. Apathy towards and objectification of human life is one of the biggest flaws in this country. Intolerance is another. We are no longer accomodating.

      I was surprised wheN i visited a jewish synagogue in Kochi (Kerala). Supposedly, jews had to flee from Egypt and they had taken refuge in India. THen then king of Kerala and the people welcomed them with open hands. Sadly, it doesn't look like it will happen anymore.

      I know ancient India is impossible but how i wish if we could once mean what it is to be the spiritual centre of the world. I was aware that Brazil had its problem (City fo GOd) but wouldn't have believed that rape would happen in other areas if it wasnt coming from you. You said it well regarding sex.

      I loved your last para. I dont have anything to comment. Hope it happens.

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